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soft spoken with a broken jaw

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you bring me hope ill see you soon [Dec. 11th, 2005|03:55 pm]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |awakeawake]
[tunes |dmb]

things are going well.
i felt like writing so i could verbally realease a bit before i drew.
i feel like a nerd.

i need a sewing machine.

things i need to get after the 16th but before christmas
jean skirt (for myself)
2 sephora gift cards
1 bong
1 ipod nano
2 fifths

i think thats all there is. im hoping thats all.
elliots having surgery this tuesday. work tomorrow should be short.
christmasy shopping with el next weekend.
shopping for others with coop next week.
this all should be loads of interesting.

i need to take more pictures and make sure to save enough for a hotel room.
i think i can spare that. new years is soon.

peter is so awesome, like second father almost. but he hasnt written me back, that is unhelpful.

well im going to draw.
need sewing machine.
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stik-urz. [May. 3rd, 2005|09:42 am]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |depressedgo away]
[tunes |my sobs]

i have this boy who draws me koalas..

sigh, life is tough. right now im the midst of such a busy week, prom is friday. me and all of my friends are such stoners we all put everything off until this week and now its just.
i have to work today, tomorrow and friday.
in between now and friday i have to get..
shoes, a hotel room, new underwear, wallet?
i dont know its just a lot of stuff to get done, not to mention tanning.

i am having the hardest time being with elliot. i love him SO much and i care SO much about him but its one of the toughest things to do, care about him. he's so unhappy and noting works out. if i dont see him in the morning we'll get into a fight and everytime im not with him i just worry. i feel like if im not with him ill get cheated on or that im doing something terribly wrong. its such a shitty situation to be in, all i can do is really be sad.
its shitty i can even describe the constant weight i have hanging from my heart. i feel so un pretty, i feel so stupid, i feel so hated..i feel not worth anything, especially anythat has to do with him.
i think i might have anxiety.
and here i bust into tears, AGAIN.
maybe im horomonal.
nope everythings just i dont know.

i have to call my dr to make an appointment for my pe waiver and such. here we go..
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ow. [Apr. 2nd, 2005|09:33 am]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |embarrassedembarrassed]
[tunes |why cant we be friends]

last night was a night of me drinking a quarter of a fifth of jamieson and a forty. last night was me NOT driving my care. last night was me belligerant. last night was me calling everyone "Ravers" "pussy bitch" and "fuckers". last night was me waking up at 4am infront of mayas house, in my car, confused as fuck. i dont remember any of this, this was all told to me. i should go call someone. hehe.
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(no subject) [Feb. 18th, 2005|08:18 am]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |hopefulhopeful]

it's friday.
it's friday!
everyone call someone! it's friday!

im so terribly pumped, it's the weekend now technically. i only really have 3 classes to make it through and then it's the weekend. that's always a nice realization. you know what's also a realization? i have lots of things i have to do, lots of cleaning. cleaning out the car, cleaning up the house. you know the deal. oh shit i think i have to take my parents to the airport on tuesday. that's not a bad thing, it's just.. lots to handle. must do lots of cleaning. i think my plan tonight is to go out for a little after school, go home for dinner, and then go out. after i get shitty at a keg and maybe kevins, then i will go home, pass out in my bed..wake up tomorrow hung over and clean everything during the day. i think elliot had paintball practice tomorrow during the day so i think that'll give me time to get things together.

so i havent completely blown my senior year. i managed to get a B in my health class, i got into college. im just wowing myself all over the place.
like WHOA.
i think i get to ride in grahams car today!
fuck yes, naggers.

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over and over again.. [Feb. 13th, 2005|01:33 pm]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |pissed offpissed off and sick]

yeah so im über sick, its NO good. i woke up this morning at about 9 and way cying. my throat wanted to kill me. so my parents i think are making me an appointment tomorrow. we'll see how that goes, i think im just a retarded who got sick and didnt take care of herself at all in anyway so im still sick. its like a long drawn out sick though. whatever.

so conrads been seeming a little mad lately, hes been all mad because hes been stuck in his house but i dont know. its odd because i can usually tell hwen conrads mad, especially when hes mad at me and thats the vibe im getting so im not too sure and he wont answer my questions as to if hes mad or not. so now i think hes just being really immature. JERK.
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(no subject) [Nov. 12th, 2004|06:16 pm]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |crushedcrushed]

i just cried and got my sock all wet, thats yucky.
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the higher you fly, the deeper you go [Aug. 18th, 2004|08:03 pm]
soft spoken with a broken jaw
[feelin' |predatorypredatory]
[tunes |RHCP]

yeah, BITCH.
it's for the best.

leave a comment.
<3 me
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